Hey team I have finally decided to become a powerful political pundit whose scathing criticism of all of the pathetic and horrible bureaucrats in Washington provides a shining beacon of hope for the sheltered and uneducated masses. This post is sure to move you in ways you haven't even imagined yet because I am going to rock your political world with more insight and suave persuasiveness than you can possibly comprehend.
Now first let me talk about the recent press conference about the health care problems wherein our "great" (did you see what I did there) president answered the questions of many wonderful local people who are so poor and struggling and Joe Six Pack who is important to pundits like me. I understand the working class you see I really have watched a lot of documentaries and read a lot of blogs about them so I really can understand their plight.
For example I was listening to Rush Limbaugh last night and he was interviewing a poor American who only made a little over two hundred thousand dollars a year and his wife was pulling in a paltry one hundred and fifty thousand a year and they were saying how they had to cut back on gas for their SUV because they simply couldn't afford to commute in it anymore and he was appalled by this and he stated that it is entirely the fault of the Obama administration and health care reform and death panels for killing their grandma and they explained how their grandmother had a stroke at 82 and the death panels decided to keep her alive and she is still alive and happy.
Now if you are anything like me you were angry about this and really want someone to speak out about this outrageous outrage. I think that someone is destined to be me. So in retribution I went ahead and called Washington D.C. so that they would get a mouthful of the people's fist of furious fury.
"Hello" was their all-too-innocent answer. "HELLO YOUR FACE" I yelled back at them, indicating immediately my intellectual superiority. I was soon transferred to someone very high up and I asked them "What is your plan surrounding the dealing of and dealing with or for the new health care reform not to not not not build death panels to not not not not not not murder the elderly and also the octomom?"
They were stunned by my powerful and probing questioning. He began to reply but I immediately shot back with "don't forget today is D alliteration day" and he readied himself once more to speak "don't deject domestic dealings during December delegating detestable death" and I replied with "dast doth don Deuteronomy during Darack Dbama's ddminstration dor dew dealth dare deform? "
He said "dumbass dumbass dumbass" and hung up. If only they were prepared to answer the tough questions that us genius pundits pose. Man just wait until next week when I reveal more about the corruption of government officials who, as it turns out, spend at least 400 dollars a year on food alone!
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